Devices are negatively affecting the way we communicate. Humans do not just communicate by the spoken or written word. We also communicate via non-verbal communication (body language).
Phones are great for helping us to keep in touch with others, but they are also affecting our interpersonal communication.
Eye contact
Eye contact is reducing due to the frequency and time people spend looking at their phones. But eye contact is vital for human relationships, such as our communication, understanding and empathy. It is part of the complex way that we communicate. When we make eye contact with someone else, our neural activity can synchronise. This is known as interbrain synchrony.
Protection
For some, phones are a form of protection. Looking at our phone can be a way to avoid contact. Research by Baron and Campbell suggests that some people, particularly women, use phones to avoid interacting socially with strangers.
Holding your phone close to your face can make it harder to see other people around us, again affecting communication. Research suggests that our phone can become similar to a fourth wall. The fourth wall is an imaginary wall that separates actors from the audience in a stage play. The phone works in the same way. The user will use their phone as a barrier, a way to control their face-to-face interactions.
But people who avoid eye contact can find it hard to develop and maintain relationships.
Real World
Focussing on our phone when we are with others or walking around the world in general, means we are not focussing on the real world.
Reduced Social Skills
Using eye contact helps us to develop our social skills.
If we stare at our phones instead of the people we are with, we are losing an essential part of the communication process. Staring at your phone and avoiding eye contact can also suggest disrespect and rudeness in some cultures. Reduced eye contact can also reduce our emotional connections and affect our ability to impress or influence others.
By avoiding eye contact, it can increase our anxiety in social situations, and lead to increased isolation.
Distraction
Phones and screens can also distract us. This can lead to reduced eye contact and less social engagement, which can again affect our relationships and communication with others.
Checking our phone when we hear it vibrate, ring or see it light up can also suggest that what is happening on our phone is more important that the person/people in front of us.
Sleep
The human brain is affected by light. Bright light tells us it is time to get up. Blue lights on phones, TVs, computer screens etc therefore trick our brain into thinking it is time to get up. So, if you look at your screen near to bedtime or in the night, it can affect and disrupt our sleep.
Tiredness affects our communication. It can reduce our emotional control and cognitive processing. This means that we may struggle to find the right word. We may find it hard to understand what someone is saying. It can also affect our non-verbal communication, reducing our eye contact and also how warm we are in our conversations. This can result in misunderstandings with the person we are communicating with thinking we are being rude or hostile.
Headaches, blurry eyes and tiredness can also affect our communication. When we are tired and not feeling great, we are less likely to want to communicate with others in a positive way.
Remember Your Physical Wellbeing
Looking at mobile phones and screens can cause eye strain, blurriness, headaches, dry eyes, reduced blinking and myopia (near-sightedness). These can all particularly affect children.
To protect your wellbeing -
Make sure your screen brightness and contrast matches your environment to avoid bright or dull lighting.
Keep your phone at arm’s length.
Use the 20:20:20 rule. To avoid eye strain, every 20 minutes look for 20 seconds at something 20 feet away.
Maintain good posture.
Take breaks.
Don’t use phones or screens close to bedtime or when you should be sleeping.
Improve communication
It is important to prioritise face to face interactions to gain a deeper connection and improved communication with other human beings.
Keep communication mindful. Encourage eye contact during conversations, meetings, courses etc.
Emphasise the importance of personal connection.
Have tech free time and zones. Have areas where you cannot use technology. For example, your bedroom, or certain areas of the workplace, or the classroom. Some countries, such as the UK, are banning the use of mobile phones in schools.
Practice eye contact if you find it difficult.
Use apps that turn off your computer or phone at certain times, to avoid the distraction of notifications.
Remember, humans are social animals. Eye contact is an essential part of how we communicate with others.
We offer courses on improving communication, such as
Relationship and Communication Counselling
Communication
Contact us on admin@acs.edu.au for more information.
